Hans Island Debacle
by LadyAxisNeoluna
Summary: There was one good reason that Arthur preferred Alfred over Matthew, a certain Dane may be a big hint as to why. DenCan, hinted USEng. Kink meme dabble.


Canada had been particularly stressed over the continuing issues with Hans Island. Although it brought his country odd publicity, it wasn't worth the constant ministrations of ownership from Denmark. And no he didn't mean the co-operations of protecting the arctic territories with the partner nation; it was something more…personal.

"This debate is going to kill me one of these days" Canada told England before continuing to sip his tea. Whenever he felt stressed he would visit to talk with England about something or just to get a break from America's antics or France's perverse advancements, "negotiations with the Danish officials and there's still no progress with the sovereignty, it's really getting to me England." He wondered when this ridiculous issue will ever escape him since it really wasn't worth the hassle, mostly with his significant other.

"I know lad, issues like this take an insurmountable amount of time to resolve" England assured "do mind that the issue with Rockall's ownership is still under debate, coincidentally it involves your husband as well."

"Yeah…it's funny to note" Canada replied nervously.

"But what worries me more is why you agreed to marry Denmark."

"England that's really far from the point" Canada tried to excuse, he really didn't want to connect the personal condition of marriage that Denmark asked of him the same day of the first boundary treaty. It was odd to say the least but it's hardly something to be mentioned.

"Canada…" England warned the younger nation "I'm just concerned of your decision lad. Denmark is…well Denmark is someone I particularly do not think makes a good match for you. He's loud, oblivious, and emotionally bipolar; I do not see your appeal with him."

"Why do you stay with America is a better question!" Canada quires heatedly only to retreat quickly to his milder disposition. "I'm sorry but I don't like being reminded constantly of Denmark's overbrown flaws, he's not that bad just… expressive."

England furrowed his thick brows. "How has he been treating you?"

Canada started blushing like mad; did he really have to answer? "H-he has been…well, just well with me."

"Really now?" England pressed.

"Yes England well" Canada set down his tea cup to place a hand on his neck "but recently… he's been more possessive of me than usual."

"Oh?"

Canada sighed and unzipped his jacket, he pulled his shirt collar revealing various love bites and bruises on his neck and even shoulders; some were still fresh. "Do I really need to explain further?"

England blinked, "It would help my case" he focused on his former Dominion's neck with disturbed curiosity.

Canada coughed uncomfortably "Denmark really loves to give me hickies when we have sex sometimes" he sighed and pointed to two just below his right clavicle "I received these two this morning" turning around, he lowered his beige jacket and pulled his shirt to show the nape, revealing three more prominent marks "and…he gave me these just before the border meeting, we did it in some closet."

England face palmed at this "I can tell why France didn't object to you two marrying; the brute's a monogamous version of that frog."

An audible knock on the oak door sounded to interrupt them. "Hey England, is my Mattie there?"

Canada had to smile at this much to England's displeasure of the guest "I better get that before he axes your door…again." he told England and headed to the door.

"Mattie, are you in there or did England's cooking kill you? If it did England, I'm going to skewer and mount your head on a pike once I get inside!"

Canada opened the door with a Danish axe head centimeters from his face, although Canada surprisingly didn't flinch at the deadly object's proximity. With being married to the Dane for nearly four decades, he just knew the oddest things about him, like his husband's unprecedented control with anything that would harm him; it's almost disturbing on itself. "You really shouldn't try axing doors Denmark, it's rude."

Denmark blinked for a moment in immediately dropped his axe aside to hold Canada tightly. "Oh Mattie, I was worried you were thinking of leaving me this time."

"For the third time already, I'm not leaving you Denmark" Canada sighed "it will take more than another spat over Hans Island to make me leave you, I love you."

"Well I love you too, but I'm not taking any chances of any case of you leaving, all my brothers left me and my autonomous regions have been bothering me for independence" Denmark worried.

"Well…" Canada pulled away with a rather mischievous look "is there anything that can convince me…" he licked the underside of Denmark's chin, to stop to a kiss on his pulse, his lips lingered down to the Dane's collar, biting and licking the area to mark his dear husband, a manner either of them was familiar with prior or during coitus "that leaving you would be crazy?" Canada told him rather teasingly and finished with a quick kiss on the lips.

The Dane became worried, to confused, to turned on in no time flat, maybe England was right about him being emotionally bipolar, "oh I could convince you with a thing or two…in England's bed" he told him huskily before picking up his axe.

England almost choked on his tea before he quickly swallowed hard and placed his antique cup on the saucer, even in shock he didn't dare spit his good tea all over his favourite rug, "Don't I have a say in this?" he called out upset. In a flash, the axe's blade nearing his neck, its owner shone a disturbingly happy smile.

"It's either your bed…" the blade slightly inched closer to his neck "or your head, your funeral England" Denmark claimed nonchalantly.

England dry swallowed at this "C-carry o-on upstairs then" he stuttered with raised hands.

"Smart former empire" Denmark uttered sweetly before leading Canada upstairs, Canada mouthed "sorry" before they disappeared into the corridor.

England sighed in relief and sank back on his chair "This is a reason why I favor America."


End file.
